El triunfo del Balón de Oro de Kane es una respuesta gloriosa a la adulación de la ceremonia por parte de las celebridades | Barney Ronay

The England captain spoke movingly on night of deserving winners and unintentional hilarity in London

Well, there’s something new. Football: now available in new, genuinely heartwarming flavour.

There was a lovely moment at London’s Palladium theatre, with the clock creeping towards 11pm at the end of a startlingly shrill and bloated evening of never-ending awards and never ending award-related excitement.